Election erections
Fuck I hate election years. I am afraid to say that aloud for fear of George W busting through my window SWAT-style and kicking my commie ass, but I can’t keep it in any more. I wish I had a witty analogy to describe why I hate the election process. Let me see what I can do:
The election is like going to a bar filled with incredibly hot women. These women spend the entire night trying to convince you to take them home with you, but the catch is you can only go home with one. They are so desperate to fuck you that they start making up the most outrageous lies. This one has three tits. That one has a pussy that tastes like chocolate cake. By the end of the night they are no longer trying to pick you up, but instead are attacking each other in a horny rage. You just want to go home, so you pick the most convincing slut and leave the bar.
Everything changes once you get back to your place. She proceeds to drink all your booze, shave your dog, download kiddie porn on your computer and take a dump in your closet. She then ties you to the bed and gets naked, which is when you find out what she’s been hiding in her panties.
A big hairy dick.
As you lay there tied to the bed getting fucked in the ass, you begin to wonder if you made the wrong choice. But don’t worry - all those women in the bar had dicks. It doesn’t really matter which one you pick. You always end up getting fucked in the end.
